It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times...
So this is what the web has come to.
  Flame Willy    (It's the new national pastime!) 

The Fanfic  (I try not to judge the writers. That's for a vengeful God to do.) 

Links                              ( Sites where they actually expend some effort. )


-Tuesday, March 13
   Willy here. Plus two sweeeeet new stories by Kryten.
   Something disconcerting happened while I was updating the site today. I got a look at it for the first time using a normal CRT monitor and all I can really say is, Holy effing Buddah, did I do that? I mean, graphically, this is one ass-ugly website when you look at it with a monitor that's got its tint, contrast and brightness set properly. The Planet Roadmap guy was right to slam it. Damn.
   Anyways, to all the people who wrote in to wish me well while I was having my bones replaced and my muscles put back in: Thank you. your letters have made this ordeal a great deal more bearable. And, okay, Roscoe, you win. I'll write another story. Am already working on one, in fact, although so far all I've got committed to disk is the plot outline and a few scattered paragraphs.

-Thursday, Feb 22 
   Good news: 
   Willy's stable again, plus they saved his leg. He was lucky; his surgeon, a doctor Burgess, is apparently one of the very top men in limb preservation surgery. Most of the damage to his knee will heal in time, but unfortunately it's going to be a very long time before he can walk on his own again. At least he's awake now, though. I fixed his laptop and brought it to him in the hospital a few days ago, but he's not really up to doing a lot of typing yet. So I guess this site's stuck with me for another week or so. 

-Saturday, Jan 20 
  Hi, my name is Scott. You people don't know me, but I'm Willy's brother, and I'll be running this site from now on. The problem is, a couple weeks ago a huge wooden block fell on Willy and crushed his left leg. Nobody knew where he was at the time, so we didn't find him until two days later, by which time he was in pretty bad shape. His knee's been destroyed, the bone was poking out of his skin in a couple of places, and he'd lost a lot of blood. He's in the hospital right now, drifting in and out of a coma, but during one of his lucid periods he gave me his computer and a list of his passwords and asked me to take over his website. So the site's still running, and if anyone wants to submit anything to it you can just send it to Willy's normal address and I'll take care of everything. Also, if anybody wants to send him a get well message, I'll be sure to show it to him if he wakes up again. 

-Sunday, Dec 17 
  Everybody here's read Roscoe Mathieu's stories, right? Well, now Roscoe's working on a new comic strip, Storytellers Anonymous. Though not Futurama or fanfic, it's still very funny, in a dilbertesque sort of way. 
  Here's something else interesting: seems the Parents' Television Council  disapproves of Futurama due to its "obscene language" and "scatological references". Fuck 'em. 

-Tuesday, Dec 12 
  Greetings and salutations, fellow people-with-too-much-time-on-their-hands! Finally solved my server problems today. Yep, Tripod tech support finally came through for me, and I barely even had to take a hostage. 
  I've got a big update for today. 'Course, after two and a half weeks of down time, I damn well better have a big update. Added the much talked-about "Final Journey" by Brad and Dave, as well as the first three installments of Dave's "Dark Side of the DOOP". True, these have been out for quite a while, but here's the way I look at it:  
If you haven't already read them elsewhere, shame on you. Here's your chance to redeem yourself. 
  In other news, I made an astonishing herpetological discovery yesterday. It turns out that second-hand pot smoke will make a Veiled chameleon turn psychedelic colors. Funniest damn thing I ever saw. I took some pictures, too, just to make sure later that it really happened. Some day when I've got a scanner maybe I'll post them. 

-Friday, Nov 26 
  I would like to take this opportunity to say Happy Birthday to Kryten, one of the most fan-damn-tastic writers in fandom. Were it not for you, my friend, this world would be a crappier place. 

  Broke my all-time record today with sixty-three hits. Unfortunately, though, the site failed to get even a single visitor. Maybe I should make an effort to let people know it exists.