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(Open to usual shot of the Planet Express offices at night. Fry is in the lab, looking at some pages on the Internet. Leela comes in, drinking coffee.)
LEELA: Hey Fry…

FRY: Hey…

LEELA: Whatcha looking at?

FRY: Some WebPages from the 20th century….computers sure have changed since my time…

LEELA: Well, of course they have. For one instance, in the early 21st century, Bill Gates bought out every company, and turned them all into ‘MicroDellIntelAppleSoft’. And computers are in EVERYTHING now, from this room to my wrist communicator to the doughnut your eating…..

(Fry eyes the pastry and tosses it over his shoulder…which Amy trips on and falls down a flight of steps in the background.)

FRY: The future is SO strange…sometimes I wonder if this is all the deranged imagination of a bored 14 year old…(clicks on a WebPage, and is shocked) What the hell is this? ‘The Futurama Outlet’…?!?!?

LEELA: (looking over his shoulder) My God, Fry…THAT’S US!!

FRY: This is too weird….even for Y3K…(clicks on message board)

LEELA: Look at all these messages…about people totally IDENTICAL to us!!

FRY: Yeah…Uh oh! What’s this about XXX pics…

(POV Computer monitor. Fry and Leela watch the monitor…look horrified, and then gag and run, covering their mouths. Two different retching sounds occur after they run off screen….and as Bender runs on screen.)

BENDER: What about XXX pics? (looks at screen) Oh…my…God. (runs around screaming as his head starts spinning in circles.)

(The title sequence appears here. The gag caption is: ‘Leela’s deep dark secret is: (Egyptian writing). The old cartoon is a clip from those old Superfriends cartoons.)

(Back at P.E offices the next day, Fry, Leela, and Bender are sitting at the conference table, awaiting their next assignment)

(Farnsworth waddles in)

FARNSWORTH: Good news, everyone!!

FRY/LEELA/BENDER: HIT THE DECK!!! (fling themselves under the table)

(Farnsworth shrugs, waddles outside, and stomps on the building’s balcony. He stutters back in)

FARNSWORTH: OK, I hit the deck….whatever that was for…….

FRY: It’s an expression…you don’t literally hit a deck.

FARNSWORTH: Whatever…..anyway, you’re making a delivery to the planet Eqiunox today….

LEELA: The universal preserve for equines? Why and what for? No one lives there….

FARNSWORTH: Well that’s ALMOST true. The robotic caretaker that lives there said they need more hay…..

FRY: OK, no problem…

FARNSWORTH:….and they have some fertilizer to ship out.

FRY: Bender can do that part.

LEELA: Yup.

BENDER: HEY!!!

FARNSWORTH: Now now, stop your bickering! This planet has a dangerous element to it…

LEELA: What?

FARNSWORTH: Fry and Leela, under ANY circumstances, do NOT drink the water on this planet…if you do, a horrible thing will happen…It’s why no living human resides on this planet.

LEELA: (nervous) What!?!? What might happen?!?

FARNSWORTH: It’s so horrible…so evil…so I don’t know.

(Fry and Leela give each other a bizarre look)

FARNSWORTH: Now, you two youngsters run off and do your duty….oh….I seem to be in my pajam…(falls asleep)

LEELA: Come on, guys…Let’s let the Prof. count his sheep while we  do our delivery…

(The trio walks out as Farnsworth stirs himself awake)

FARNSWORTH: Zzzz……..what sheep? There are no sheep herrrr……ZZzzzz……..

(The ship flies off from Earth, and then can be seen descending upon a planet looking similar to Earth.)

(On the bridge, Leela is telling her crew the delivery game plan)

LEELA: OK, Bender. You’ll have to be the one who makes the actual delivery, as Fry and myself have no interest in finding out why drinking water on this planet is bad for you….

FRY: And you’re also loading the fertilizer, cause neither of us wants THAT job…

BENDER: Oh, so the lazy meat blobs give ol’ hard working Bender the dirty work?!?

LEELA: Hard working?!?!

FRY: Bender, you just sit on the couch and drink Pennzoil and BudFoster’s Light all day long!!

LEELA: And what about the LAST time you made a delivery? When we were asked to deliver the ashes of President McNeal to be buried?

BENDER: Hey, don’t blame me for that one!! The guy wanted somrthing to help plant his flowers!!

FRY/LEELA: Whatever…

FRY: And don’t forget  your affair two weeks ago in the North East-by-South West Side!

BENDER: Marilyn Modem was a FRIEND and a FRIEND only!!

FRY: SURE Bender. If you say so…..

LEELA: Bender, we’ve landed….just go out and DO IT!!

BENDER: (arms crossed) Nothin’ doing.

FRY: Fine. I’ll do it, and risk…uh…whatever I’m risking. (opens door, gasps) Oh my gosh, Bender! Fat people!!

BENDER: (rushing to the door) Where? Where? I feel like making fun of some.fa….

(Fry and Leela rush up behind him and push him out the door, and the lock it.)

FRY: OK Bender, do the delivery, and we’ll let you back in…

BENDER: (slamming fists on the door) You double crossing flesh wads!! I’ll get you for this…(he grumbles as he plods down the gangplank, and gets the hay)

(In the ship, Leela and Fry are talking to themselves…)

LEELA: I dunno, Fry…wasn’t that kinda cruel?!?

FRY: Nah, the  guy needed it. I mean, we’re his friends and all, sure, but he needs to be forced into something every now and then, and besides, I bet you ten to one that he’s doing business with the caretaker like a gentleman.

(Bender is getting his head pounded by a metal hoe)

CARETAKER: (whacking him several times more) You ungrateful Mac reject!! If I EVER find you making fun of my dot matrix again, I’ll rip your processors out and shove them down your binary relays!! Come on, dot!

(He picks up a sobbing dot matrix printer/android combination and walks back into his shack)

BENDER: Well that’s all fine and good, because I got all the hooker bots I want on Earth!! (looks around, walking) Now where’s the fertilize…..(looks down, and stops walking) Ah......darn it!

(Fry and Leela, meanwhile, are still waiting aboard the PE ship, wondering where Bender is)

FRY: Ya know, I’m wondering wear Bender is…

LEELA: He must have been having a drink with the caretaker…

(Suddenly, both of them are drenched from above with water as Bender saunters in, laughing.  None of them realize it, but Fry and Leela are briefly surrounded in a white glow after the water stops falling.)

FRY/LEELA: (coughing up water) Bender!!

LEELA: What the hell was that for!!

BENDER: Because you played a joke on me!!

FRY: Oh…but where did you get the water from?

BENDER: Out there in a lake…I destroyed the water sprinkler system in the process because it’s wimpy like you and had only a little bit of water in it. By the way, the sparks from the sprinklers caused a fire  in the hold, but I don’t care cause I’m gonna have a drink…(walks off)

(Fry and Leela look at each other with a look that says the same thing: “Water from a lake outside!?!?!!”)

FRY: Well, we’re still alive….

LEELA:  And we’re not burning up, or in pain, or anything like that….

FRY: Yeah….besides, we didn't drink any.........

(Cut to Bender, who is standing in the ship’s pantry. Everything’s burning around him as he takes a swig from his beer bottle)

FRY: And it could have been worse…instead of dumping water on us he could have dropped some of the fertiliz….

(As Fry says this, Bender presses a button on wall nearby him, smirking. There is a splat, and two distinct groans. Bender chuckles.)

(The ship comes down out of Eart's orbit and down towards New New York. Smoke is streaming from parts oft the hull, and there is severe warping near the cargo holds.)

(As the ship lands, a very angry Hermes is standing alone in the loading bay, watching the damaged ship land)

HERMES: (to Bender) Good John, Paul, George & Ringo!! What happened here?!?

BENDER: How the hell do I know? Ask the meatbags........I gotta go watch 'Celebrity Head Deathmatch'......it's the creator of the Simpsons agianst the creator of Malcolm in the Middle........(walks off)

(As Bender leaves, Hermes turns his attention to Fry and Leela, who emerge from the craft soaked, dirty, ash covered, and miserable all over.)

HERMES: All right you two......maybe you can..............(pauses, then covers his nose) Good Tower of Babel!!  I'll talk to you two after you've taken a shower!! (walks off)......kids today............

FRY: Well, shall we go take a shower?

LEELA: (giving him a look) Well, seeing as we've been fighting a fire, had horse manure dropped on us, and then had to put up with Bender's other tricks, I think it MIGHT be a good idea to take one............SEPERATELY..................

FRY: (mutters) Damn. (normal voice) Yeah.....and I though Bender was gonna stop with the itching powder.........

(As Fry and Leela walk together to the showers area, they both suddenly rub their stomachs and groan..........)

FRY: Aw, man............don't tell me Bender spiked our food twice....?!?!?

(A few minutes later, Bender, and Amy are watching the main event of the deathmatches)

BENDER/AMY: GO MATT!!!!! WOO HOO!!.

(Shot at the TV. Matt Groening is biting the Maalcolm creater's head like no tomorrow. He finally strikes a nervous area, and knocks they guy out.)

ANNOCUER: And Matt Groening is the winner!!

(The duo cheers, as the other annocuer continues)

ANNOUCER: Coming up next, the head of Bill Gates against the head of Steve Jobs.....who really IS the biggest nerd of Silicon Valley?

AMY: (getting up) Well, that's enough Really High Definition Interactive TV for now........I'm going to pick up some coffee.........Bender, you wanna come?

BENDER: Nah, I wanna watch the next fight......I want Gates to bite the crap out of Jobs.

 AMY: I know, can't say I blame you........now we can actually sit on asses at home but be involved in the important events happening galaxy-wide.............like talk shows!

(Meanwhile, in Dr. Zoidberg's office........)

LEELA: ..........And both Fry and myself have had re-curring stomach crapms, and everytime they come back,  they're even worse then before! Aand it's getting kind of hard to flex some joints some ways......

FRY: Yeah, and we have this sudden craving for only......oats and hay?

ZOIDBERG: Hmmm............(knocks on Fry's back a bit with a 'reflex mallet) Have you had any other symptons? Dizziness? Coughing? A sudden desire to shed your skin and run screaming down the street?

FRY/LEELA: Um..........no.............

ZOIDBERG: I'll go scan in the data........then we can descide on a treatment.

(As Zoidberg leaves, Fry and Leela wince again.........another wrack of cramps.........and calm down as Zoidberg returns)

FRY: It just happened again!! I can't take this!!

ZOIDBERG: Well.............I got the news here..........according to this, you have........4 hours to live.

FRY/LEELA: Wh....wha.....WHAT!?!??!?! (they stiffen as the color LITERALLY drains out of them)

ZOIDBERG: (mutters)  I hate it when this happens.........

(He grabs a large sponge, sops up the colors, and squeezes it over the bleached white Fry and Leela........the color flows back into them)

ZOIDBERG: Oops.........silly me..........It was upside down. (turns it a bit) You're having space diaherria.

LEELA: (annoyed grunt, grabs it) Lemme see..............(reads, mumblres).........Perfectly fine!?!?

ZOIDBERG: Don't look at me, what do you think I am, a doctor?

FRY: Uh........YEAH.........

ZOIDBERG: Oh yeah, I am one........(shrugs, then walks off)

(Fry and Leela sit for a minute, and start convulsing about a cramp again)

(Back in the TV lounge)

BENDER: I tell you, Interactive HDTV is the greatest thing since they combined Diet Dr. Pepper and Pepsi One into Diet Dr. Pepsi Pepper One!

FRY: (as he and Leela walk in) shakes his head) Bleah, I remember Pepsi One........

(Flashback to 1999: Fry is riding the Staten Island Ferry, sitting at bar, about to drink Pepsi One. Like the ad, the ship leans over, and his soda slides away, and a can labeled 'Cleaning Grease' slides into his hand. He takes a swig, and spits it out)

FRY:  (spitting violently) BLEAGH!!!!! This crap's horrible! Bartender, get me another drink while I wash this horrible tast out of my mouth!

(Fry gets up and leaves. The ship tilts the other way, and the Pepsi One comes back.)

FRY: (returning and sipping the soda) Now THIS stuff's good!!

(Returning to the year 3000, Fry shudders again)

BENDER: See ya later Amy.....get me some alcohol.........remember, NO NON ALCOHOLIC BEER!!!

FRY: Yes, PLEASE remember.........we're STILL picking bits of those guys out of the engine reactors!!

AMY: Flu'h, don't worry, I'll remember..........(she leaves)

BENDER: I'm gonna go get the TV Guide.....see what's on after this.....(leaves)

(Leela switches off the set........she and Fry sit silently for a few minutes)

LEELA: Hey Fry.........have you been still getting cramps and joint tightening today?

FRY: (taking off his jacket) Yeah........they keep dissapearing, but getting stronger and longer everytime they come back..........

LEELA: Probably  one of Bender's tricks..........

FRY: Yeah..........um, Leela, there's been something I've been meaning to do...........

LEELA: What?

FRY: Thanks for saving my keister all those times..........

LEELA: Thanks........and I want to say I appriciate you preventing me living out the rest of my days as a giant slug on Wormulon.....

FRY: (leaning closer) No problem.........

LEELA: (leaning closer) Because of the fact there's always people around, we can never be alone and just talk to each other........But there's been something  I've wanted to do.........

FRY: What?

LEELA: (moving in, puckering her lips) This............

(Fry puckers his lips.......they slowly move closer........but before the lips can meet, both keel over, grabbing their stomachs, groaning.)

FRY: Ah, man........this is this worse yet.............now I've got a splitting headache........

LEELA: Yeah, me too.........I..........(she screams)

FRY:  Leela? LEELA?!?! What's wrong?!?

LEELA: I don't know.............I'm just in so much pain.........!!!

(Fry moves towards her, but gets stricken the same way)

FRY: It feels like I'm getting torn apart inside!!!

LEELA: My bones feel like they're turning to rubber!!!!

(Fry and Leela scream out in pain again.........then suddenly, both transform into unicorns in a flash of blue light. The ordeal is so hard, they lose consiousness and get knocked out. A few minutes later, they come to......)

FRY: (shaking his head) Aw man, what happened?

LEELA: I dunno..........I.........(she looks up at the door) Oh my God......

FRY: What?

LEELA: Look..........

(They see their reflections.....two horned horses, lying amonst shreds of torn clothing.)

FRY: Ahhh!! What happened!?!?!?

LEELA: Well, I'm no rocket scientist, but this might be why we weren't supposed to drink the water on Equinox.........

FRY: We didn't drink it!!

LEELA: Well, maybe touch infects too.......I dunno, damn it!!

FRY: We have to see Farnsworth! He can help us!.

(By this time Bender waltzes in, and he finds two terrified unicorns standing amadst town clothing and a torn open wrist communicator. One unicorn has a faint shade of orange in their mane, the other purple)

BENDER: What the Hell are you two horses doing in here?!?

LEELA: Bender, it's us!!

FRY: It's me, Fry!

BENDER: What are you two whinning at me for?!?

LEELA: (to Fry) Oh no.........he can't understand us!!

BENDER: Hey, where's Fry and Leela!??! (looks at the clothing) Oh my God, are they streaking? Did I put in the crazy powder instead of itching powder in that soup on our way back to Earth!? I gotta find them!

(Bender walks over to a door leading outside)

BENDER: But first, I'm letting you two outside! (the unicorns shake their heads no) Come on, you two, I've gotta find Fry and Leela! (he 'helps' them out, and shuts the door as Amy comes into to TV lounge) Hey bimbo.

AMY: Shut up Bender........go get Fry and Leela and tell them I got their coffee........(pauses) ......it smells like a stable in here.........

BENDER: Can you blame it? These two unicorns appeared in the TV room, and then I found Fry and Leela's clothing, and I think they're running around naked somewhere......

AMY: Huh? (walks into the lounge, then yells) BENDER, YOU ZIDIOT!!!!!  THAT WAS FRY AND LEELA!!!!!!!!!!

BENDER: No it wasn't.........

AMY: Bender.........if TWO unicorns suddenly appeared in the same room they were in, and they left behind a red jacket and shattered communicator, WHO do you think it could be?!?!?!?

BENDER: Uh........

(Amy growls and grabs Bender arm, walking forward with him in tow)

AMY:  Come on, we gotta see the Prof. and see if he can help!!............G'uh, you're pretty light, Bender......(looks behind her, to realizie she ripped off his arm) Oh......oops.........(walks over  to re-attch it)

BENDER: I can't believe it........those horses were my friends..........and I just let them out the door! Why wasn't I thinking!??!

(Meanwhile, a bewildered Fry and Leela are walking around the Planet Express building, to enter another way......)

FRY: It's perfect Leela! WE just go in another way, and we're fine.........

(As they approach, Leela looks at the door, and rolls her eyes)

LEELA: I see a slight problem Fry..............

(Fry walks up to the door.......the only way in is to pull the handle)

FRY: What?

LEELA: WE DON'T HAVE HANDS ANYMORE!!!!!!

FRY: Oh........yeah............

LEELA: (annoyed grunt) Well, maybe we can somehow get someone to open the door for us.......

(URL, the Robot Peace Keeping officer, walks over)

URL: Huh. You call yourselves mystical, all powerfully wonderful creatures? Can't even open a door! You're about as useful as Machintoshes! We should take all the Macs and send them to planet Scrapola on a rocket that would explode halfway there!!!

(Url is tapped on the shoulder. He turns to find a VERY pissed robot twice his size and strength looming over him, next to his sobbing wife)

ROBOT: Hey, BUB!!!! My wife's mother's a Machintosh!!!!

URL: (after a moment) Damn.

(Url streaks off down the road, with the robot close behind)

LEELA: Alright, I'm gonna try to pull the door open with my teeth........(she bends down to grab the handle with her mouth)

FRY: Leela, why are you so anxious to get back in.......?!?!?

LEELA: I can't explain here....would take too long......

(She's almost there when two men across the street who have been staring at them for a while realize what they're looking at)

MAN: Holy  Bandwagons, Barman! Those are unicorns!!!

MAN 2: I notice, Robin Joe......let's get 'em!!!!

(The two men rush for them............Leela, of course, realizies what's happening first)

LEELA: Oh, God.........not this! Come on Fry, we've got to make tracks!!!

FRY: Why!??!?!

LEELA: No time! Follow me, and LET'S GO!!!!

(Fry and Leela sprint off, followed by a growing mob of New New Yorkers........)

(Meanwhile, Amy has filled in what has happened to Fry and Leela.........)

AMY: ....and now they're out in the middle of New New York, and we don't know where they are!

FARNSWORTH: Oh my! I told them to be careful on Equinox! But no matter....I have a video that will help us, and explain  everything to anyon who maybe following this story for some reason.........it's with my alien mummies sampler pack.........

(As Bender and Amy sit down, Farnsworth pops in the tape.....)

(We see the Earth.......circa 2600's. The text over the planet reads: 'THE GREAT FANTASY DISASTER OF THE 2600'S". Cut to New York........buildings like the Empire State and the World Trade Center barely prominent anymore, surrounded by other sci-fi'ish buildings. But that's besides the point. The streets are populated with people as well as dragons, unicorns, centaurs, ant other mythical creatures......and these creatures have an awful look on their faces....)

VOICE: In the years of the term of the 'Mad Governor of New York', hundreds of New Yorkers continued to defy the governor in their own ways. Some had in street revolutions. Others made fun of him. And even more people put flaming bags on his doorstep. To crack down on the revolt, he began to experiment with genetic engineering. He brought mythic creatures such as the dragon, the unicorn, and the IRS guy to life. And gave them a mean streak to boot if the populous did not fall in line. And if they refused still.......he mad even MORE drastic measures.........

(The governer is shown leering over a young lady strapped down on some sort of chair. He forces her to drink some sort of water........which changes her into a ticked of satyr.)

VOICE: His genetic researchers came up with water that could hold tiny robots......which  he dubbed, 'tiny-bots'. These creations could either enter the human bloodstream or come in contact with a person and re-write the DNA of the victim to the DNA of the animal the tiny-bot was programmed with. His plan was such a sucess, that he devoted his time in office to his hobby of stealing landmarks all over the world and putting them on a beach.

When the governor was shot dead trying to steal the Hollywood Sign, his enemies rounded up all the animals they could and distrubuted them on planets all over the quadrent. The mutagenic waters were also scattered on those planets. Today, after the ruthlessness of the 2600's, any mythical creature found in New York is taken to a pound where it is left to wait for extermination.

AMY: So THAT'S what happened........Come to think of it, I remember hearing about this on Mars. U!!

FARNSWORTH: Only people from New New York would really know about this......it's been kept secret from the rest of Earth for quite some time over the years........not even robots are programmed with the knowledge.

BENDER: It all makes sense.......in a crazy, stupid, not really making sense kind of way.

VOICE: The only way to reverse the effects is to.........

(The screen suddenly goes to static.........and fades to a postion that means it's being filmed in a hand held camera in a bush, and a fat robot waddles by........with sneers coming only from Bender)

AMY: BENDER!!!! You taped over the only solution to our problem!!

BENDER: WEll, how was 'I' supposed to know they would suddenly shift speices?!?!?

FARNSWORTH: Please, please! It's all a simple matter of firing a DNA rejuvinating lazer at them!

AMY: G'uh!?? How did you know that!

FARNSWORTH: I am a scientist.........(points to himself) See the coat? (looks down) Or is that my pajamas............? (falls asleep)

AMY: Come on Bender, we gotta find Fry and Leela before it's too late!

BENDER: Oh, calm down, meat head..........I'm sure they are just backed up to a safe place somewhere out of town............

(Fry and Leela are seen backed against a building, in front of a large mob.)

LEELA: Please, don't hurt us! We're not what we seem......(to Fry) OH, who am I kidding, they can't understand us!!!

MAN 3: They're making no voilent moves, and seem to be surrendering! Subdue them!!

(Some guy cattle prods the poor kids into unconsiousness)

(When they wake up, they find them selves stuck in some sort of chamber.)

LEELA: (groaning) Great..........things have gone from worse to interstellarly terrible!

FRY: What is this, Leela? The zoo?

LEELA: I wish!! Ya see, Earth has banished unicorns since the 27th century....so any  unicorns found on the planet are destroyed..............

FRY: (screams) We're ARE gonna die after all!!!!! Right?

LEELA: (annoyed) Uh............yeah...........

FRY: AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Amy and Bender are looking long and hard for Fry and Leela.........and they are no where to be found..........)

AMY: (rolling eyes) Bender, they are not going to be at the liqour depot, the porno studio, or Electronics Botuqiue, so GIVE IT UP!!!!!!

BENDER: Hey! I'm just covering all the bases........

(As they pass Pete's TV, Amy sees something out of the corner of her eye..........)

MORBO: And in the flip side, two unicorns were captured today. They are first unicorns to be caught in almost 400 years in New New York. They are being held captive at the new Harlem/Bronx Dog Food Factory, as that is what that is what they will be made of after they are killed off.

NEWSLADY: That's quite a 'unique' story. Morbo. (giggles)

MORBO: (laughs) Morbo wishes a comet hits your pathetic planet and blows it to bite size bits.

AMY: (gasps) Bender, I know where Fry and Leela are!!

BENDER: Where?!?!

AMY: Three blocks this way! C'mon!

(In the chamber, Fry and Leela are coming to terms with their fate)

LEELA: So, I guess this it............

FRY: Yeah.........

LEELA: I guess I should say goodbye.............

FRY: Yeah........I'm gonna miss you............oh God, Leela, I'm SO sorry I was such a klutz!!!

LEELA: It's OK, Fry..........I need to tell you something........I really li...

(Amy and Bender break down a wall of the chamber)

AMY: Fry, Leela? Is that you? (pauses) Clunk a hoof once for yes, twice for no.

(Leela nods and clunks her hoof once. Fry, eager they've been found, clunks twice.....then once........then twice. An annoyed Leela pokes Fry in the rib cage with her horn. After yelping, Fry clunks once.)

AMY: Yep, it's them all right! (wipes brow) Phew! Thank goodness we found you two!

BENDER: Aw......Fry......Leela....can you guys ever forgive me? I feel like such a jerk, I don't deserve you as friends! If I knew the water was gonna make you swap spieces, I wouldn't have drenched you in it!.......probably. Can you ever forgive me?

(Fry and Leela think for a moment......and side kick him into the wall.)

BENDER.........Ow. (falls apart)

(As Amy finishes re-assembling Bender, alarms go off........the break in has finally been detected)

LEELA: Damn! We better move...........

(She scoops Amy up on her back, and breaks out a full trot, Fry close behind.........and Bender bringing up the distant rear)

BENDER: Oh SURE!! Leave poor old Bender behind! (pants as he runs)

(Fry and Leela bolt for Planet Express. As they approach, Leela slows down so Amy can get off her back and open the doors for them. The duo squeeze through, and head for the Prof's lab)

FARNSWORTH: (watching them trot in) Oh, good! You've arrived! Now just stand there, and you'll be humanoid again in no time!..........(brings up a lazer, and fires........)

(The first shot turns Fry and Leela into centaurs.....Farnsworth mumbles and fires again........he turns them into centuars from the waist UP. He tries again........and hears a scream, shredding cloth, and a moo......he turns around, and sees that he acciedently somehow turned Amy into a bettle cow)

FARNSWORTH:Whoops! Sorry Amy!!

(He turns the lazer on Amy and changes her back....and she storms off, naked, swearing in her native language. He tries ONCE MORE on Fry and Leela.........this time sucessfully reversing the change. Fry and Leela cheer and hug each other in joy.)

FRY: You did it Prof!

FARNSWORTH: Naturally! I _AM_ a scientist! Or am I STILL in my pajamas?

LEELA: Um, Prof.....one more thing......

FARNSWORTH: Yes?

FRY/LEELA: GET US SOME CLOTHES!!!!!!!!!

FARNSWORTH: (chortles) I'm dong no such thing! I'll have Amy get your clothes!

(Farnsworth waddles off to look for Amy.........leaving behind two naked, embarrased young adults....)

FRY: Well, that was fun.........

LEELA: Yeah.........

FRY: This is SO embarrasing......although we are naked, and  alone............

LEELA: You look at me, and I'll dig your eyes out of your skull.

FRY: Sorry.........it's just that, well, I think you're pretty cute Leela..........

(Leela's glaring, beat red face relaxes a bit)

FRY: Really, I think you are the best looking lady I've ever seen. Those morons who look at you as a freak are so wrong. And so are those who look just for beauty......you're the smartest, most well rounded woman I've ever met.....: ...and I mean your personality, not your um... well those too, but... you know what I mean, right? (wincing, in a pleading voice) Please don't hurt me...

(Leela turns to face him)

LEELA: Fry, do you really mean that?!?

FRY: (a beat) Yes.

LEELA: (flinging her arms around him) Oh Fry.........that's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me!!

(Fry looks down at their chests touching... gets a happy, glazed look on his face... Leela notices the look. and roll her eye)
LEELA: Um........Fry........
FRY: Oh.....right........sorry.........
(Fry looks away....then back quick......away....then back.........then away.)
LEELA: (slightly annoyed sigh) OK, I get the point!! But did you really mean those words?!?
FRY: Yes, I already told you!
(Leela re-tightens her hug around Fry)

FRY: Actually, I got it from a movie.....

(Leela doesn't let go, but gets a look of pure shock on his face)

FRY: But I mean every word of it!

(Leela relaxes..........pulls away. She and Fry look each other in the eye)

FRY: And there's something else I want to tell you........and that is..........

AMY: (offscreen) G'uh, are you guys gonna get a room, or get dressed?

(Fry and Leela whip around to see a re-dressed Amy, blushing again)

AMY: Here's your clothes.........(takes out a match book from her back pocket) and the address to the Neo Waldorf-Astoria-Motel 6 Hotel. One of my boyfriends took me there on a..........night out..........liked it. (leaves)

FRY:(pulling on his pants) Man, I sure feel better now that I'm a biped again!!

LEELA: (slipping on her tank top) Yeah, me too.........(looks behind Fry) Um.........Fry?

FRY: Yo? (quizzical look on his face) That's strange..........I can't get my pants OR underwear up all the way........

LEELA: I think he missed a spot.........

(Fry looks behind himself. He still has the tail of a unicorn on his backside)

FRY: (grabbing it)  What the Hell!?!?!?! Leela, I can't be a freak!! This is like having an extra arm, or only having one eye.........

(Leela glares)

FRY: (correcting himself) .......or, er, not that there's anything wrong with that... if you're not a human, I mean...

LEELA: (sighs) Fry, just tuck the thing down your pants leg, and go talk to Farnsworth......the ray probably needs to be re-charged.........

FRY: Later........I hear that Calculon is facing his evil brother in a deathmatch on 'All My Circuts!' (he runs off)

LEELA: Fry, wait! You didn't.........!

AMY: (offscreen) YAH!!!!!!!!

BENDER: (laughs)

LEELA: (pulling a hand over her face) .........pull your pants and underwear all the way on yet........